Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Tug of War











Another day dawns in the life of Stephen and still the tug of war rages. The demons, my demons are still there, tauting me, haunting me, tormenting me, but I refuse to allow them to drag me back into the darkness . . . the darkness I have struggled so hard to escape. Wait, don't start shouting Hallelujahs from on High, I have not swung open the closet door yet, but something has changed. The white flag has been raised, my feet, for once, planted firmly on common ground. Years spent trying to analyse how, why, or what I should have done is over, it's to late, it's water under the bridge. Time spent contemplating on what the future holds is over, I cannot see further than today. So, honestly I can not say this year will be the year of freedom or if it will end like the last one, or hundreds of others that have come and gone, but you know, it is OK.

7 comments:

christopherc said...

Life is lived but a moment at a time. The past is but a trivial inconvenience that casts us into a direction for the future. The future has yet to arrive and today at this moment we live and are commissioned to enjoy the life we have.

Cherish your moments and enjoy life; thanks for sharing a bit of it with us!

-C

Anthony said...

Live for the moment, one day at a time.

I am glad its OKAY Stephen.

With Love
Anthony

daveincleveland said...

awesome progress buddy...it is ok, just wish i could convince myself of that........you are evolving stephen and so happy to hear it
hugs and love from cleveland
dave

Derek said...

YOu can do it mr. Wish I was there to give you a bearhug.

Anonymous said...

Darlin', you do have a wonderful talent for melodrama. If I might offer a suggestion, though, "this is not a dress rehearsal." Get out and do something. It will make you happy. Trust me on that. Move, move! NOW.

Ur-spo said...

remember always that demons do their best job by scaring you with illusions and things not real or true
and they can not endure being laughed at.

Rob said...

Hi Stephen...None of us is immune to wrestling with demons. Sorry that yours have been so "active" lately. But a new year brings new opportunities for self-discovery and empowerment. Please know that we, your friends, are by your side cheering and rooting for YOU - knowing that you will be victorious. And those "hallelujahs from on high" that you spoke of...those are the shouts of gratitude of people fortunate enough to call you "friend." Love you buddy. Sending big hugs.