Monday, January 22, 2007

Searching






I never dreamed, never imagined, didn't have the slightest inkling of what this New Year was going to bring my way. Well, now I know! Work, work, and more work! Right from the start, from the very first day of this new year, my life has centered around nothing but work. I've had very little down time, very little time to update this dying blog, very little time to check in on the lives of friends whom I have missed. So very little time.

There must be a reason. Why have I let myself be so consumed with work? Sitting here, looking at the computer screen, I search for the answer. But I wonder, will I find what I seek by looking for it on the screen or will I find the answer to what I seek, lurking in the blackness of my own mind.

Stephen, eyes closed, rested, arms folded over chest, lying on a black leather sofa . . . while another part of Stephen sits at a desk. This Stephen, the one at the desk, has a pad in hand, he peers over the glasses he has sitting on the bridge of his nose, he looks at the image of himself lying there on the couch, he bites the tip of the pen, thinking, contemplating but saying NOTHING. The Stephen on the couch waits, peering off into space, seeing NOTHING but the blackness behind his closed eyelids, he waits and waits and waits. But there is . . .






6 comments:

Brad said...

I don't think your blog is dying at all, Stephen. It just mirrors the fact that your own life is incredibly busy.

Keep posting whenever you can. I'll still be here.

Anonymous said...

The darkness is just a mask for color...all you have to do is allow yourself to turn on the light and enjoy the colors of life...Wow! that did not sound like me! Reflection is good! Don't worry about us...we will come visit no matter how often you post!

daveincleveland said...

hang in there buddy......sometimes the dark is good , but it will get better....at least thats what i keep telling myself...you know how to get me if you ever need to talk
dave

Anonymous said...

My sweet Stephen...I echo the comments left by your other buddies above. You know that I am always here for you if you need a friend -- just need to talk -- whatever. Believe me, I know just how busy life can get. But like the other boys said...we'll always be here to read, no matter how often you are able to post. We enjoy hearing from you whenever you have time. I love you, my buddy Stephen...and will always be here for you. Always.

Tony said...

I so know the feeling of work, work, work from my last job. What am I saying...I know of it know even as I have been going to school full-time for the pat three years plus.

Something always consumes our lives if we let it. Guess the trick is moderating it...the hard part obviously. Hang in there much like I am doing at the moment.

daveincleveland said...

where oh where is dear sweet stephen....missing you buddy