Sunday, October 15, 2006

Revolving Door

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The night before even though it was darker than a witch's cauldron when I closed out the world for the day everything seemed clear. My mind made up. But this morning when I look in the mirror, there is a stranger staring back at me, I look at the man and I no longer know him. The revolving door of Stephen's life. Do I get off on this side, do I get off on the other side, do I continue riding around and around in circles? Fuck who knows anymore.

3 comments:

daveincleveland said...

i dear boy keep asking myself that same question, and i think we both know the final answer, to be true to ones self, one must get off the revolving door and live our real life to its fullest for what ever time we have left....and that dear steven has become my motto.....

The Persian said...

I agree with Dave, while the jump might at times seem risky, being true to yourself is the only course to making yourself feel whole.

I realize it gets confusing at times, but what you truly need to do will always resurface.

*HUGS*

Stephen said...

daveincleveland, making that first step I guess is always the hardest. It is easy to plan it all out in the confines of the mind but being able to bring it out into the light of reality, at the expense of someone elses happiness, is almost impossible.

the persian, it is true, it has been a long time since I have felt whole, what I've always been able to bury within has of late been all consuming, resurfacing more and more. What lies ahead, none of us know, but I will hold onto your words of wisdom: being true to yourself is the only course of making yourself feel whole, my heart felt thanks, my friend.